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Is Valentine's Day Meant to Torture Singles - Q & A with leading US love coach


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Was Valentine's Day Meant to TORTURE Singles?


With Valentine's Day around the corner, we decided to ask Los Angeles-based relationship pro Kathryn Alice, author ofLove Will Find You (Da Capo), for some insight into how to get through Valentine's Day when you are single.


Kathryn laughingly observes, "When you're with the love of your life, most days are romantic so you don't really need Valentine's Day. So sometimes, I thinkValentine's Day was meant to torture singles."


Q: Good point, let's jump right in. Why is that?

Kathryn Alice: Valentine's Day points out you're not with anyone, and it's tough if you see everyone else in the office receive flowers except you. People newly dating have their own hell of trying to figure out an appropriate gesture for where they are in the relationship, but honestly, February 14 hits singles the hardest.


Q: So what do you do about it? I know you have a popular Youtube video to help folks specifically on Valentine's Day. 

KA: The most important thing is to start getting real about it. Valentine's Day is just another day arbitrarily pushed by Hallmark Cards to boost sales. It is no statement on your love life. You may meet someone soon after.


And remind yourself that we're all single for some Valentine's Days. I myself went through some pretty lonely Valentine's Days as a single mom before meeting my husband.


Q: In your video you go further than that, and tell people they can actually use February 14 to find love. Is that really possible? What do you do?


KA: I've had a ton of people actually meet someone on the day or shortly after. Here's the protocol I use to make V Day enjoyable for singles.


1. Do the attitude adjustment I mentioned from above so you're not blowing the whole thing out of proportion. Remember it's just another day and will soon enough pass.


2. Look for any events on Valentine's Day to go have some light fun with friends or put together a singleton gathering - even if it's just meeting after work for Happy Hour. People are more aware they don't have love on V Day, and so more open to connecting.


3. Go buy a card or gift for the Valentine you don't have yet, which is a forward-looking gesture saying "Yes, I will have my love." Almost every student I've had does this and ends up giving it to their Valentine later. I myself had a card I had for a couple of years that I bought on a Valentine's Day that I gave to my husband on our wedding day.


4. Do something nice for someone else to get out of your own misery. There are people with worse problems and so for example, sending flowers to a lonely widow will make you feel good and spread the love.


Q: Sounds good. Any other final suggestions?


KA: Just take good care of yourself. Give yourself a special treat and keep the faith. Love will come along before you know it! And Valentine's Days will never be the same. You'll never even remember your single February 14ths.




For further information, please contact: Caroline Ratner, Caroline Ratner Communications, 0208 209 0120



Notes to Editors


[image]Kathryn Alice was a single mom for 10 years before meeting her soulmate, Jon. She's a late bloomer who then had two more children in her forties. Kathryn is considered one of the U.S.'s foremost experts on soulmates & dating. Author of the bestsellerLove Will Find You, she teaches around the world and is responsible for thousands of people recovering from heartbreak and finding the love of their lives. Her work has been featured inPsychology Today, USA Today, Daily Mail, New York Times, Parade, NBC, CNNand many other media. Kathryn has been married for 15 years and has four boys. To find out more about Kathryn's work, visit her website